Story Time 3: Cyril the Swan Goes On The Rampage & Taylor Swift Charms Corinthians

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[00:00:58] Hello there. This is James and what you're about to listen to is a special slightly different

[00:01:08] football club episode to normal, which was first released at the beginning of January

[00:01:12] 2024 to The Football Book Club Club. Every fortnight, The Football Book Club, receives an exclusive

[00:01:20] bonus episode just like this one which regular football club listeners won't have access

[00:01:24] to. So, if you'd like that and much, much more, make sure you head to patreon.com forward

[00:01:30] slash football book club where you can sign up for just £3.50 a month as patreon.com forward

[00:01:35] slash football book club. Enjoy the episode.

[00:01:40] Hello Football Book Club listeners.

[00:01:48] I'm welcome.

[00:01:49] Sorry, it was too... I can't... I can't... I know, I can't...

[00:01:59] You've just become accustomed to you going, hello like that.

[00:02:02] I know, it's different, I'm like, oh god, what's he gonna do?

[00:02:07] This is Story James, the other name.

[00:02:09] What is the fourth biography of your age?

[00:02:11] Story James.

[00:02:12] Well, he's here to stay whether you like it or not my little friend.

[00:02:17] Oh, welcome.

[00:02:19] The doors of window are locked.

[00:02:21] And welcome to another edition of everyone's favourite football book club spin off.

[00:02:27] That's right, it's Story Time.

[00:02:29] Well, instead of reading an autobiography, we all go around the group and bring a lovely

[00:02:33] football story to tell each other.

[00:02:36] And speaking of which, I'm joined by three very lovely storytellers.

[00:02:41] Say hello, Jabberne, huh?

[00:02:42] Hello, Jabberne.

[00:02:44] I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

[00:02:45] I just wanna go and see my wife and kids.

[00:02:48] Time for that.

[00:02:50] Say goodbye.

[00:02:55] Say hello, Natasha Frisco.

[00:02:58] Hello.

[00:03:01] Want to get down now please.

[00:03:05] And say hello.

[00:03:06] James Belgium.

[00:03:08] Hello.

[00:03:09] I like it.

[00:03:10] I prefer this.

[00:03:11] Yeah.

[00:03:12] I don't like it either.

[00:03:15] I'm not a big fan, but I'm glad that you like it James.

[00:03:19] I just call you up in the future when I call you up, I just do that voice every single time.

[00:03:23] I'll just talk you to sleep.

[00:03:25] You'll see BV's voice.

[00:03:26] My CBO's voice.

[00:03:27] Yeah, my milk hunter voice.

[00:03:28] I think we just said we could have been inside the door.

[00:03:31] Oh, that was a long time ago.

[00:03:33] Wow.

[00:03:34] Do we know what?

[00:03:35] I can't remember when we win.

[00:03:36] What do we get called again?

[00:03:37] Have you written it?

[00:03:38] We will be back.

[00:03:39] Oh, don't worry, I've written that down.

[00:03:40] Oh, we were revealed in a second.

[00:03:42] But it has been a long time.

[00:03:44] We haven't done an episode of Storytime.

[00:03:46] This series which means we haven't done one I think for a year and a bit, year and a half or so.

[00:03:51] So we're all happy.

[00:03:54] I'm not that answer my next question.

[00:03:56] Happy to be back in Storytime mode.

[00:03:58] No.

[00:03:59] Okay.

[00:04:00] Natasha.

[00:04:01] I am.

[00:04:02] I am very much.

[00:04:04] I will come to it when it's my turn, but I am feeling a little under the weather today in this.

[00:04:09] Right in this really packed.

[00:04:11] Oh, there we go.

[00:04:12] That's good.

[00:04:13] There we go.

[00:04:14] Restorative.

[00:04:15] Go to my loins.

[00:04:16] Okay.

[00:04:18] Oh no.

[00:04:19] James like the sore guy.

[00:04:22] Natasha was gone sexy.

[00:04:23] No, that was my...

[00:04:24] Let's be honest.

[00:04:25] The loin stuff was from my voice earlier on.

[00:04:27] That's that was entirely different.

[00:04:28] Yeah, that was not...

[00:04:29] That was good.

[00:04:30] Oh no, James, you see baby's voice is good.

[00:04:33] My loins.

[00:04:34] The milk has been hunted.

[00:04:36] What would you say?

[00:04:38] James, you're indifferent.

[00:04:41] James Jack really hates it.

[00:04:43] Tashary loves it indifferent.

[00:04:45] James.

[00:04:46] What Storytime?

[00:04:47] Yeah.

[00:04:48] I like Storytime.

[00:04:49] Okay.

[00:04:50] I like Storytime.

[00:04:51] I like it.

[00:04:52] See James is positive.

[00:04:53] Why can't you all be positive?

[00:04:55] It's going to be very good fun.

[00:04:57] We've got four of these.

[00:04:58] Anyway, he's going to make this out alive.

[00:05:00] He's played the game before.

[00:05:01] It's been...

[00:05:02] We've got four lovely stories for you guys.

[00:05:05] Without further ado, let's start Storytime.

[00:05:08] And of course, let's play the theme.

[00:05:10] So if you haven't listened to Storytime before, everyone on the show has been tasked with

[00:05:15] the theme.

[00:05:16] So if you haven't listened to Storytime before, everyone on the show has been tasked with

[00:05:27] bringing a story to the group.

[00:05:31] The story can be old, it can be new, it can be anything really.

[00:05:36] It just has to be football related, loosely football related.

[00:05:40] That's the only rule.

[00:05:42] Is everyone got one?

[00:05:43] Yes sir.

[00:05:44] Everyone's brought one.

[00:05:45] I like the sir.

[00:05:46] I do like the sir.

[00:05:47] It seems like it's starting to grow a little bit, James.

[00:05:50] Grow up.

[00:05:51] And at the end, we all vote for whoever's brought the best story.

[00:05:59] And the best storyteller will be crowned King Story Person winner of hearts and minds.

[00:06:05] That's it!

[00:06:06] That's it!

[00:06:07] Well, Tash, you should know because you've been reigning King Story Person winner of hearts

[00:06:12] and minds over a year.

[00:06:14] And I plan on keeping my title.

[00:06:16] Yeah.

[00:06:17] How's it felt?

[00:06:18] How's it felt?

[00:06:19] It was a great round.

[00:06:20] It was a great round.

[00:06:21] It was a great round.

[00:06:22] Heavy is the head that was the crown.

[00:06:23] I didn't feel the pressure today, but I'm coming out fighting.

[00:06:26] Yes.

[00:06:27] Last time you brought a lovely joyful story about Albanian people being criminals.

[00:06:33] Thank you all.

[00:06:35] A story about the Albanian national team getting detained he throw.

[00:06:40] It's a very good story.

[00:06:42] One the day.

[00:06:44] So guys, you all know the heights that we often reach on this show.

[00:06:48] So I'm expecting a strong, strong story time.

[00:06:53] And Jack and my only James and Tasha have been crowned by the way.

[00:06:57] Jack and I never have this pressure on our shoulders.

[00:07:00] But Jack has been big in his own art today.

[00:07:04] We have a group chat and Jack has been torn to big game.

[00:07:07] It was like Crocodiles in the mortar underpins.

[00:07:09] Yes, it was.

[00:07:10] Possibly.

[00:07:11] It was.

[00:07:12] I loved it.

[00:07:13] But Jack the braggart.

[00:07:15] Yeah.

[00:07:16] Jack the huge.

[00:07:17] Brankadochi Jack.

[00:07:18] Yeah, yeah.

[00:07:19] I think I've just, I've just, I don't want to, I don't want to make it up too much.

[00:07:23] I don't want to say it's, I know that it's a great story and I feel excited to tell you all about it.

[00:07:30] Interesting.

[00:07:31] Okay.

[00:07:32] That's good.

[00:07:33] That's good.

[00:07:34] Well, I think I would just like to call your attention to the message that you sent at 1919 yesterday.

[00:07:40] Oh, time stamp.

[00:07:41] I don't, I don't want to oversell it.

[00:07:44] But I think I've found the greatest story ever.

[00:07:46] Yes.

[00:07:47] Jack has been running a PR campaign and 20 hours and none of us will be swayed by it.

[00:07:53] None of us will be swayed by it.

[00:07:54] Full of consideration.

[00:07:55] Take that full page out.

[00:07:58] It's great.

[00:07:59] You can't retell the Crocodile mode one we've done that.

[00:08:04] What if it's on about Albania's being crunls near crocodiles?

[00:08:07] What are like three?

[00:08:09] That would be good actually.

[00:08:11] That would be good.

[00:08:12] That would really be our whale house.

[00:08:15] And let's get into it.

[00:08:17] Let's kick off with the reigning champion.

[00:08:19] Of course, Natasha Frisco.

[00:08:21] I'm sorry.

[00:08:22] I'm sorry.

[00:08:23] I'm sorry.

[00:08:24] I'm sorry.

[00:08:25] No, that's good.

[00:08:26] No, it wants to go first.

[00:08:27] You know, you're the king story time winner of hearts and minds must.

[00:08:30] As the winner of all of our hearts and minds, you must free us.

[00:08:33] True.

[00:08:34] Yeah, Levi.

[00:08:36] Okay.

[00:08:37] Well, so I did something bad.

[00:08:41] I was trying to research some funny interesting stories for story time because the one...

[00:08:48] I don't know if you remember the one that I did about Port Vale hosting a metal show.

[00:08:51] I think about that all the time.

[00:08:54] Let me, let me, let me not limit.

[00:08:57] Let me, I wanted to do something like, yeah, let me was not involved.

[00:09:02] I wanted to do something along those lines.

[00:09:04] And then I found this amazing story about a prison in Uganda that's developed this league named after

[00:09:10] Premier League clubs and it's reforming offenders.

[00:09:13] And it was going to have highs and lows.

[00:09:15] And then like, something from my wildest dreams.

[00:09:18] I found this amazing pull.

[00:09:20] It's a worthy piece from this PhD student at Harvard on how night has bottled the scent of cleats on a football pitch pumps into their stores

[00:09:28] to make people feel the emotion.

[00:09:30] I was going to do something like that.

[00:09:32] However, as you may have noticed, I'm feeling a little delicate today.

[00:09:36] You can probably see a sort of haunted look in my eyes.

[00:09:40] And last night, I went to see the prodigy because my friends band Softly was supporting.

[00:09:45] Oh yeah, yeah.

[00:09:46] They were very good.

[00:09:47] I should've said no, no, and we were doing this today but look what they made me do.

[00:09:52] I have an 11 out of 10 hangover today.

[00:09:55] Champagne problems I know.

[00:09:58] So instead of writing anything emotional and gorgeous, all I really wanted to do is lie horizontally on the sofa with a nando's.

[00:10:05] So I decided to shake it off and do story time, Taylor's version.

[00:10:11] I was going to say, I know.

[00:10:13] The shaky dog gave it away.

[00:10:15] You said, look, you may be do earlier as well, right?

[00:10:18] I have written this.

[00:10:20] I have bolded out all of the, there's so many hidden in this.

[00:10:24] Whoever can spot the most can get my prize.

[00:10:27] Oh wow.

[00:10:28] So unfortunately it looks like our Taylor is not buying not counting, which is a shame.

[00:10:33] That's a dream that was going around a few weeks ago.

[00:10:35] And I was kind of ready to see a collaborate with Jake Burg or something.

[00:10:39] But next year I'm going to see Taylor at Anfield and Wembley.

[00:10:43] So I thought I would see if there was anything that linked the two great loves of my life to see if I'm a mastermind.

[00:10:49] Or if my reputation would be solid.

[00:10:52] Very good.

[00:10:53] I'm ready for it.

[00:10:54] Oh, no, no.

[00:10:55] I'm ready for it.

[00:10:56] Oh, I know that.

[00:10:57] Hey, people going over my hands.

[00:11:00] I thought Taylor said they've been on mastermind.

[00:11:02] I didn't recognize that title.

[00:11:04] Oh, or like you just started doing Clive Miley references.

[00:11:07] Yeah.

[00:11:08] Just get further and further away from what you were saying before.

[00:11:13] Yeah.

[00:11:14] Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.

[00:11:17] So anyway, as it turns out, Taylor has some very funny ties to soccer.

[00:11:21] I know she's big NFL at the minute, but I've got two bits to share for this story time.

[00:11:26] Two small bits, but they make one excellent story.

[00:11:29] So firstly, I want to talk about the weird parasocial relationship she's got with the Argentine national team and Corinthians in Brazil.

[00:11:36] Do you know about this?

[00:11:37] No.

[00:11:38] So firstly, in Argentina like football superstitions run really deep.

[00:11:43] And a ritual has developed in Argentina because the last time they qualified for the World Cup,

[00:11:48] the one that they went on to win, it was Taylor Swift's birthday.

[00:11:51] And the first goal happened on the 33rd minute, which is how well she turned that day.

[00:11:55] And the manager who everybody loves used to wear the number 13, which Swifties know as her number.

[00:12:02] So when they went on to win, TikTok in Argentina decided that it was all because of Taylor.

[00:12:08] And she was their lucky charm.

[00:12:10] And they started posting clips of the final edited Taylor Swift songs,

[00:12:14] tickly clips of Messy to your own kid, which is a bit weird.

[00:12:17] But then when they went so viral, the Argentine national TV channel, which is run by the government,

[00:12:24] every time the national team plays doesn't matter at what level, if it's just a friendly or whatever.

[00:12:29] They put videos, they put Taylor Swift videos on the telly with edited clips of the game that reference the lyrics that are playing.

[00:12:36] And it's just the kind of thing that they don't.

[00:12:38] So this last week, it was both the era's tour in Buenos Aires and the qualifying match for the World Cup,

[00:12:45] both at the Estadio Mass Monumentel and the country went mad for it, obviously.

[00:12:51] The TV channel aired hours of Taylor Swift edits all week to wish both Taylor and the national team good luck.

[00:12:58] How was it going?

[00:13:00] All too well.

[00:13:03] Because it's her, yes, she's the problem it's Taylor.

[00:13:08] She ruined the bloody pitch.

[00:13:10] So which meant they had to relocate the match to Lab Bombanera.

[00:13:13] At the very last minute, which ruined all of the other superstition rituals that they have around the game.

[00:13:19] There's loads of them that they have at the other stadium that they just couldn't do.

[00:13:23] And it broke Argentinians winning street.

[00:13:26] They lost two nil to Uruguay. It's the first game they've lost in ages.

[00:13:29] And it gets deeper.

[00:13:31] So she's now in Brazil.

[00:13:33] Tonight as we record this, Argentina are playing Brazil.

[00:13:38] The day after Taylor played in Rio.

[00:13:41] There was a national petition going around in Argentina that had nearly half a million signatures.

[00:13:46] To get the game moved to further after the show, to avoid the curse of Taylor coming again.

[00:13:51] Because if yeah, which is unsuccessful because the match has taken place in like six hours.

[00:13:56] So let's see how that goes.

[00:13:59] But Corinthians fans on the other side love her.

[00:14:02] Do you know why?

[00:14:04] The Taylor Swift rule.

[00:14:06] Okay.

[00:14:08] They had never lost a game on either side of her album releases up until the re-release of Speak Now recently.

[00:14:14] When they lost two nil to São Paulo.

[00:14:16] Well, that's pretty good going right?

[00:14:18] These albums are lucky.

[00:14:20] However, in the squad named for tonight there are no Corinthians players on the Brazil team,

[00:14:25] which has led to TikTok petitioning the Brazilian manager to include Yuri Alberto.

[00:14:30] It was the only Corinthians player with a recent call up to the national team to see if they can gain the luck.

[00:14:35] The Argentina have just lost.

[00:14:37] Wow.

[00:14:38] Because that's how it works.

[00:14:39] Is that giving them up?

[00:14:40] Yeah.

[00:14:41] Okay.

[00:14:42] So there's even a blog dedicated to finding who the next Taylor Swift is now a song but the album didn't work for them.

[00:14:49] I'm sure you've got to use the scalps for all of them.

[00:14:52] You need another one, right?

[00:14:53] Yeah.

[00:14:54] So it's rise against is number one.

[00:14:57] And then Bjork, the unlucky as a release set is Paul McCartney believe it or not.

[00:15:02] So yeah, that's that's part one which is mad and it's literally happening right now.

[00:15:07] My next little love story is about the one who belongs with me.

[00:15:12] It's Jude Bellingham.

[00:15:13] So this week.

[00:15:14] Jude Bellingham?

[00:15:15] Yeah.

[00:15:16] She should do.

[00:15:17] So this week he won the Golden Boy Award, you know best player under 21 in Europe.

[00:15:24] It's big deal.

[00:15:25] Previous winners.

[00:15:26] Holland and Bappe and obviously Messi.

[00:15:29] And yes, Jude is smashing it this year.

[00:15:31] He's had 30 goals in 14 games.

[00:15:33] He's a very deserving winner.

[00:15:35] But do you know what really helped to cause?

[00:15:37] Swifties.

[00:15:38] Oh yeah.

[00:15:39] Nothing may do better than revenge.

[00:15:42] Yes.

[00:15:43] Tootto sport.

[00:15:44] Did a Twitter poll about who should win between Jude and Barcelona's Alejandro Moldo

[00:15:50] and while it is voted for by 50 sports journalists they do take into account the public votes as well that are inputted online.

[00:15:57] And until last week Jude was trailing at around 20% when a Swiftie uncovered an old interview where Baldi says he doesn't like Taylor Swift.

[00:16:08] Oh.

[00:16:09] I smell bad blood.

[00:16:10] Jude had 30,000 votes and in just seven minutes of the tweet being posted.

[00:16:16] He had 100,000 new votes and rocketed to the top of the list.

[00:16:21] By midnight he had 89% of the vote.

[00:16:25] Barcelona fan pages tried to compete.

[00:16:27] One even created a bot that automated votes for Baldi once a minute.

[00:16:32] But they failed miserably against the power of the Swifties and Jude ultimately ended up with 65% of the total votes cast.

[00:16:38] And then went on to win.

[00:16:40] So there we go.

[00:16:41] Yes.

[00:16:42] Swift Storytime.

[00:16:44] Very good.

[00:16:45] Very good.

[00:16:46] That's incredible.

[00:16:47] Yeah, it's.

[00:16:48] It's the power of the Swifties is incredible.

[00:16:51] I saw a bunch of spurs after that happened.

[00:16:53] I saw a bunch of spurs fans pretend that angepostercoglu had said loads of positive things about.

[00:16:58] So they've voted in the in the in the mange of that so embarrassing.

[00:17:04] Oh, yeah.

[00:17:05] It's fun.

[00:17:06] Okay.

[00:17:07] If we show more of a Beyonce man.

[00:17:10] Exactly.

[00:17:11] I was going to say he's more of a Beyonce man.

[00:17:13] I said.

[00:17:14] I like.

[00:17:15] Yeah.

[00:17:16] Who is he likes Robbie?

[00:17:17] That's it.

[00:17:18] Robbie did that song for him.

[00:17:19] He re-ro-

[00:17:20] Yeah, I know you lot.

[00:17:21] You're not saying Matilda.

[00:17:22] The Paul Fale song.

[00:17:23] I know.

[00:17:24] Well, that's what Robbie did it himself.

[00:17:27] I think he's very happy.

[00:17:28] So I did actually have an Easter egg that none of you spotted but all through the episode I've been drinking out my tape cut.

[00:17:33] Oh, yeah.

[00:17:34] That's good.

[00:17:35] I'll be honest.

[00:17:36] That'll be lost on the listeners.

[00:17:37] It will be lost on the listeners.

[00:17:39] And I imagine.

[00:17:40] But if anyone can count how many titles I hidden that little thing, then I'll be very impressed.

[00:17:46] Okay.

[00:17:47] I'll answer on the postcard guys.

[00:17:49] And very good.

[00:17:50] I'm trying to think of any Taylor Swift song to end it.

[00:17:54] You've got a-

[00:17:59] I knew you would be trolling ending this.

[00:18:03] But that was a real love story.

[00:18:10] Yeah.

[00:18:11] Shake yourself.

[00:18:12] Shake it off.

[00:18:13] Thank you.

[00:18:15] Next, am I right?

[00:18:17] Mm-hmm.

[00:18:18] Bye bye.

[00:18:19] Bye bye.

[00:18:20] Bye bye.

[00:18:21] Don't go chasing waterfalls.

[00:18:24] Right now, next.

[00:18:27] Did we go Belgian?

[00:18:29] Or do we bring the story that everyone's been waiting for?

[00:18:34] I think we should make him do it last.

[00:18:36] Jack, I agree.

[00:18:37] I agree.

[00:18:38] See if it can lift that.

[00:18:39] Yeah.

[00:18:40] So really worried about that.

[00:18:41] Mr. Bougain, not only other previous King story person winner of hearts and minds.

[00:18:48] Yeah.

[00:18:49] I mean, it hasn't got the same amount of effort as Tasha's at all.

[00:18:54] You're right with that.

[00:18:55] Good start.

[00:18:57] I like to wing it on the spot actually because you just can't be saying that.

[00:19:01] To say Tasha is like extremely on the other.

[00:19:04] That's pretty impressive.

[00:19:05] Yeah, that's true.

[00:19:06] That's what the King story's on.

[00:19:08] My hunger is extra.

[00:19:09] Yeah, my hunger was pure is extensive research.

[00:19:13] I actually couldn't probably imagine.

[00:19:14] Yeah, there we go.

[00:19:15] This is mine.

[00:19:16] Yeah.

[00:19:17] Mine's taking out.

[00:19:18] It's watchtaking out.

[00:19:19] Oh nice.

[00:19:20] I did watch a lot of 1% club today, actually.

[00:19:23] Oh, I like that show.

[00:19:24] Lee Mack.

[00:19:25] Yeah, that's good one.

[00:19:26] That yeah.

[00:19:27] I was so hungry for earlier that I entered.

[00:19:29] Okay.

[00:19:30] Oh wow.

[00:19:31] Yeah, I could do this.

[00:19:32] Yeah.

[00:19:33] I could do this.

[00:19:34] Nice.

[00:19:35] Anyway.

[00:19:36] Mr. Bougain, well, let's have your polly-pulled head.

[00:19:39] Let's have your polly-pulled head.

[00:19:40] References I get in my soy.

[00:19:41] Thank you.

[00:19:43] I'll see if you can pick them out.

[00:19:46] There was no snow on the beach when Romani returned.

[00:19:49] Weeey!

[00:19:50] That's a good one.

[00:19:52] That's a good one.

[00:19:53] That's a good one.

[00:19:54] Yeah.

[00:19:55] Featuring Lannardore.

[00:19:56] Yeah.

[00:19:57] So basically, World Cup 1930, Romania returned.

[00:20:03] One of the Romanians offered Eisenbesser Ferraru, the cool name.

[00:20:09] So on the journey back, he was taken ill during the Zalantic voyage.

[00:20:17] He was diagnosed with pneumonia when the boat reached the mainland.

[00:20:23] They got to Genoa, Genoa.

[00:20:26] And he was left in Eile to recuperate.

[00:20:28] Anyway, a huge crowd gathered at Bucharest, Gara de Nord which I think is a train station

[00:20:34] right?

[00:20:35] Impossible.

[00:20:36] In France?

[00:20:37] Sounds like it.

[00:20:38] In Bucharest.

[00:20:40] Okay.

[00:20:41] Okay.

[00:20:42] So welcome the team back, right?

[00:20:46] And when his absence was noted, rumour spread that he had died in South America.

[00:20:53] But nobody checked this.

[00:20:55] Oh no.

[00:20:56] With the actual squad or any of the cultures or anything.

[00:21:00] So the squad dispersed around the country, returned to lives and work.

[00:21:05] A distraught Mrs. Ferraru, his mother, organized a wake.

[00:21:10] Nobody let us know to mark the passing of her beloved son.

[00:21:15] Right on cue on the morning of his own work, he returned home.

[00:21:19] What?

[00:21:20] Unlook at him and fainted.

[00:21:22] But only was Ferraru not dead.

[00:21:25] This is weirdly weird.

[00:21:26] He was healthy enough to compete as a figure skater in the 1934 and 1938 European championships

[00:21:34] and also in the 1934 championships.

[00:21:36] He was in the Bob Slitty.

[00:21:38] Wow.

[00:21:39] Could you use your time?

[00:21:40] I'm not in Trilimp.

[00:21:41] Wait, if you had pneumonia, the thing I wouldn't do immediately after this is into the Winter

[00:21:44] Olympics.

[00:21:45] It's like a whole book on that for a long time.

[00:21:48] My story is just ridiculous.

[00:21:50] I like the fact that they were like, where is he?

[00:21:53] Ah, he must be dead.

[00:21:54] It must be dead.

[00:21:55] Yeah, whatever.

[00:21:56] I'm a whole country.

[00:21:57] I'm like, do you hear about it?

[00:21:58] Yeah, he died.

[00:21:59] And his mom.

[00:22:00] His mom got there and then why is that immediate, the immediate assumption that he's dead?

[00:22:05] Like how did he slip by not only the huge crowd but the whole squad without telling them

[00:22:10] about it?

[00:22:11] And also, but the squad would be like, well, he's not here.

[00:22:15] So I guess we're pretty happy that we did very well this World Cup so we're not going

[00:22:20] to think about it, but I'll play a dead die.

[00:22:23] I didn't let his mum know though.

[00:22:26] That's so much important.

[00:22:27] What was his name James?

[00:22:28] It was Alfred Eisenbaser Ferrari.

[00:22:31] You know what?

[00:22:32] Sorry, Alfred can't come to the phone right now.

[00:22:35] Why?

[00:22:36] Because he did.

[00:22:37] Because he's dead.

[00:22:38] Very good.

[00:22:39] And then his mom's like, what?

[00:22:40] And he's like, what?

[00:22:41] And he's doing a, I was doing a future Taylor Swift reference.

[00:22:45] Oh no.

[00:22:46] Turning up it is on Waker.

[00:22:48] It's pretty cool.

[00:22:49] That is so cool.

[00:22:50] What are all these sandwiches for?

[00:22:52] This plane could use like a collar, can I tell you?

[00:22:58] Yeah.

[00:22:59] That's the end of story but it's just ridiculous.

[00:23:02] I like it.

[00:23:03] Short, sweet and weird.

[00:23:04] Short, sweet and weird.

[00:23:05] I mean, we're just going to play the James book story.

[00:23:08] Yeah.

[00:23:09] Yeah.

[00:23:10] No, very good.

[00:23:14] Very good.

[00:23:15] Well, we've had two stories.

[00:23:18] So far and we'll be back after the break when we will definitely be getting back together

[00:23:25] in a few minutes.

[00:23:26] That's going to stop trying.

[00:23:27] That's the last one.

[00:23:28] We won't be doing any more Taylor Swift references after this is him trying.

[00:23:31] Yeah.

[00:23:32] That was good.

[00:23:33] We're back on the show.

[00:23:34] We're back on the show.

[00:23:35] We're back on the show.

[00:23:36] We're more stories, more stories and more story time.

[00:23:40] So we'll see you in a few.

[00:23:46] Hello.

[00:23:47] Yeah.

[00:23:48] And we at Football Book Club want you.

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[00:25:30] See you back at the club house.

[00:26:11] Hey everyone, I'm Craig Robinson co-host of The Ways to Win Podcast.

[00:26:16] Alongside my good friend John Calapari, I've been on the go recently.

[00:26:20] Phoenix, Kansas City, Chicago.

[00:26:23] If you're like me and have a home but aren't always at home, you have an Airbnb.

[00:26:28] Hosting your home or a spare room is a very practical side hustle.

[00:26:33] If you live in a big game town, you can air B&B your place for fans to stay in.

[00:26:38] Your home might be worth more than you think.

[00:26:41] Find out how much at Airbnb.com slash post.

[00:26:47] I'm Sandra and I'm just the professional your small business was looking for but you didn't

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[00:26:54] LinkedIn has professionals you can't find anywhere else including those who aren't actively

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[00:27:07] you're not looking on LinkedIn, you'll miss out on great candidates like Sandra.

[00:27:11] Start hiring professionals like a professional post your free job on LinkedIn.com slash

[00:27:16] spoken today.

[00:27:17] Wow!

[00:27:18] Nice!

[00:27:19] Yeah!

[00:27:20] What you're hearing are the sounds of people everywhere putting on bombas socks, underwear

[00:27:25] and t-shirts made from absurdly soft materials that feel like plush clouds.

[00:27:30] Yeah, that plush.

[00:27:32] And the best part for every item you purchase bombas donates another to someone facing homelessness

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[00:27:44] That's bombas.com slash a cast code a cast.

[00:27:54] Welcome back to Football Book Club Storytime.

[00:27:57] I forgot I should be doing my voice.

[00:27:59] Welcome back everyone.

[00:28:00] Sometimes you forget smithway through and if you don't remind people just carry on.

[00:28:07] I dropped it, I dropped it.

[00:28:09] He got distracted by Taylor Swift and he became even more Latin again.

[00:28:14] So we've had two stories, one from Tash about Taylor Swift and South America and connections

[00:28:22] over there.

[00:28:23] And we've had James's story about a Romanian man who didn't die.

[00:28:27] I'm guessing he's dead now though, right?

[00:28:29] I imagine so.

[00:28:31] I bet everyone is waiting like, ah, yeah, yeah, I'm on where is he?

[00:28:36] No.

[00:28:37] If he was a 1930s head, right?

[00:28:40] That probably would make him roughly the same age as Anne Ruffle.

[00:28:44] I guess it is still around.

[00:28:47] Because 1930 what, 90 years ago.

[00:28:50] Now that's a wrong comment I want to see.

[00:28:55] But I move on to my story.

[00:28:57] Story in a very loose way, but you know I'm a big fan of when 90s football meets NAF 90s

[00:29:06] television.

[00:29:07] We've had it quite a few times on the last, in this series about quite a bit of it.

[00:29:13] The general episode he went on about seven 90s shows.

[00:29:17] Went on home with the Braithway.

[00:29:19] He went on that show where he like pipped himself out to a bunch of rich horny women.

[00:29:26] And then it was like, they got completely the wrong idea.

[00:29:28] I was thinking I wasn't pimping myself as a horny woman.

[00:29:30] All I did was have sex with a bunch of women.

[00:29:33] But money.

[00:29:36] On the theme episode he went on all star mystery misses.

[00:29:40] Sharing them was on the mass thing.

[00:29:42] He even had Kevin Phillips in the past talking about how much he loves Emma Dale.

[00:29:46] So naturally I was looking up the strangest footballer cameos of all time on TV and film.

[00:29:53] There's the usual suspects and all these listicles back in King Arthur, Canton R, Frank LeBuff

[00:29:59] who've had quite varied acting careers.

[00:30:02] LeBuff's like a star on the stage now at the West End in France.

[00:30:06] Really?

[00:30:07] Yeah, and Matthew.

[00:30:08] Then there's the really weird ones, the real unusual ones.

[00:30:11] There's one where Robby Keane appeared on an old iteration of Mrs Browns boys apparently

[00:30:17] when it was over Sturland, Ireland, and America.

[00:30:20] And then the maddest one, which is not all I'm going to talk about, but the maddest one is

[00:30:24] Young Fitz Hall being in the fifth element, which is generally true.

[00:30:29] Fitz Hall.

[00:30:30] Young Fitz Hall is in there is that that's not a good enough story about itself, but Young Fitz.

[00:30:33] There's nothing there's no information about it apart from it's him.

[00:30:35] That's it he's never talked about it.

[00:30:37] It's not this isn't like the Jim Frank, I know no, um, total looks.

[00:30:41] Yeah, it's no and turns out it's not.

[00:30:44] It generally is him.

[00:30:45] It's a teenage boy who sees I can't wait to see his spaceship comes in he looks at and goes,

[00:30:51] basically that's it and that's it's Fitz Hall.

[00:30:53] But it's another 90s footballer who tried his hand at acting.

[00:30:57] I want to say and I've got a clip that admittedly is quite hard to understand.

[00:31:02] And that's, you know, 50% quality issues, 50% delivery issues.

[00:31:09] Let's say in terms of delivering the line, it's difficult.

[00:31:12] So I want you to tell me who is this paying a visit to the hospital in a 1998 episode of

[00:31:17] Classic British Crime Soap, the Bill.

[00:31:22] Did he something?

[00:31:23] Yeah, yeah, it's right.

[00:31:24] No, you are pleased to meet you.

[00:31:26] This is your home under sun.

[00:31:28] My best and legend really nice to meet you.

[00:31:30] Hi, but this is really good.

[00:31:32] He just come down, you know, I can't believe it.

[00:31:34] I never thought you'd show up for a minute.

[00:31:36] How is she?

[00:31:37] What is her name?

[00:31:38] Laura.

[00:31:39] Yeah, it's Laura.

[00:31:40] She's still unconscious and afraid, but they're optimistic.

[00:31:43] Well, you know what doctors are like in here. They're always optimistic.

[00:31:46] You've got the man with you this to her?

[00:31:48] Yeah, we did. We finally saw it.

[00:31:50] There we go.

[00:31:51] You can work out.

[00:31:53] What was happening though?

[00:31:54] That's our mystery player talking to one of the Sunhill police officers as they check up on a hit and run victim.

[00:31:59] But any idea who that mystery player is.

[00:32:02] I'm guessing his French, right?

[00:32:04] Yeah, yeah, just to be clear it was the Frenchman.

[00:32:06] It wasn't the...

[00:32:08] The police went to the police.

[00:32:10] The police one's got loads of courage.

[00:32:12] You know who it is James.

[00:32:13] Yeah.

[00:32:14] There's some guesses first.

[00:32:15] There's some guesses first from Jack and Tash.

[00:32:17] Let's see what they do.

[00:32:18] Okay.

[00:32:19] First of all, I'd like to say that he was about as creepy as your story time.

[00:32:23] What do you mean?

[00:32:25] Did you catch the man who did this to her?

[00:32:28] Yeah.

[00:32:29] So it's a...

[00:32:31] Hang on, 98, you say?

[00:32:33] Yes.

[00:32:35] Patrick Villera.

[00:32:37] Okay, there's a very good guess.

[00:32:39] Very good guess. Tash, any thoughts?

[00:32:41] No.

[00:32:42] Okay.

[00:32:43] Nice luck.

[00:32:44] No.

[00:32:46] That's a very good guess.

[00:32:48] Okay, I'll guess.

[00:32:49] A man you're a patie.

[00:32:51] James, what was your guess going to be?

[00:32:53] A man you're a patie.

[00:32:55] Let's find out as our player goes to talk to the victim's dad.

[00:33:00] You're a man you're a patie.

[00:33:04] That's right.

[00:33:05] Hi!

[00:33:06] Well, this is Laura Sparrow.

[00:33:09] Alex.

[00:33:10] I'm sorry to help out with your do-to.

[00:33:12] I'm sure she'll reggae her now.

[00:33:14] I'm sure she will too.

[00:33:16] He did it.

[00:33:17] He did it.

[00:33:18] He's talking to the questions.

[00:33:19] Yeah, that's true.

[00:33:20] Yeah, that's right.

[00:33:21] But she is responding to certain sounds and...

[00:33:24] Things like that.

[00:33:26] They say that just holding a hand, talking to her can't do it any harm.

[00:33:29] And that's mostly what men and mother are doing.

[00:33:31] Just...

[00:33:33] Talking to her.

[00:33:34] Just telling her things.

[00:33:35] I brought this for us.

[00:33:37] I'm a borrowed sign by the team.

[00:33:40] I don't know what to say.

[00:33:41] You'd like me to sing for her?

[00:33:42] Thank you.

[00:33:43] Well, a nice guy brought a sign ball.

[00:33:45] But yes, you're right.

[00:33:46] You're right.

[00:33:47] A man you're a patie.

[00:33:48] And that is the poor Laura who's been hit by her dad.

[00:33:51] Sounding far more excited to meet a man you're patie than he is sad about his daughter.

[00:33:56] I would say...

[00:33:57] And I said, hey, my Christmas through that.

[00:33:59] That's because this wasn't any old bill episode.

[00:34:01] This was the 1998 Christmas special.

[00:34:04] And I was interested to see how it happened.

[00:34:06] And why it happened?

[00:34:08] Because a man you're patie.

[00:34:10] An odd choice.

[00:34:11] Like, you know, a big 90s player.

[00:34:13] But you know, not quite in the same level of Jalora or, you know, Cantonella or someone like that.

[00:34:17] I would say in terms of being a celebrity.

[00:34:19] Obviously on the pitch, just as it is a little bit like not quite the subject one.

[00:34:23] So I'll let it up to see how it all happened.

[00:34:27] And I found these quotes from a manual patie.

[00:34:30] I didn't know much about the bill before I appeared in it for their Christmas special.

[00:34:33] I'm not really sure how they came to use me.

[00:34:36] So there we go.

[00:34:37] Good start already.

[00:34:38] Maybe it's because of the way I am.

[00:34:40] I had a long hair which made me different to the other 99% football players.

[00:34:43] I just won the double with Arsenal and the World Cup with France.

[00:34:46] So I guess I was pretty popular at the time.

[00:34:48] They asked if I heard the show, but I haven't.

[00:34:51] So that would be okay.

[00:34:52] Didn't even know what the show was.

[00:34:53] And this is when it gets really odd.

[00:34:55] They asked me if they wanted me to be a part of the show as a guest.

[00:35:00] And because of how much I loved friends, I thought it'd be the same with the bill.

[00:35:04] So I said, yeah, no problem.

[00:35:05] I'll do it.

[00:35:06] Oh no.

[00:35:07] So he thought he was going to be Brad Pitt in front.

[00:35:09] He saw that.

[00:35:10] Now you need to watch maybe one second of the bill to be very clear that isn't like it's extremely different.

[00:35:17] It's a friend.

[00:35:18] I don't know.

[00:35:19] I check it.

[00:35:20] Jerry.

[00:35:21] Who were the guys?

[00:35:22] Yeah.

[00:35:23] Like, do you know that one of those notes is like studio audience and why everyone was wearing police uniforms?

[00:35:29] It's so quiet.

[00:35:30] Why a girl had been mowed down on the first pipe.

[00:35:33] It's not funny as episode, I say.

[00:35:36] Sure.

[00:35:37] What is Gunter?

[00:35:38] It's the song logic.

[00:35:42] But fair play to Manu who went through with it.

[00:35:46] And if you want to hear a little bit more about his experiences on the bill, he said they said I'd have a few lines and all of a sudden

[00:35:50] I was just so nervous about the whole thing because my English wasn't great.

[00:35:54] But I couldn't go back on it and it was nicely invited on something like that show as a guest.

[00:35:58] You can kind of tell he's a bit nervous in the recording, I think.

[00:36:01] If you can hear what he's saying, which is very difficult.

[00:36:04] It was very good and it's not something I've thought about until where I recently when someone I was working with in France over Christmas found the video and showed it to everyone.

[00:36:11] I walked into the shop with a bouquet of flowers and I looked so thin and it sounded like I was whispering because I was so nervous about being on camera.

[00:36:18] At the time they never coming back for a second appearance though and my appearance and my possible Hollywood career pretty much ended there.

[00:36:25] Of course, my Arsenal teammates took the piss out of me for it.

[00:36:28] I used to do so many commercials back in the day so the players were always printing out photos of me and putting up in the dressing room.

[00:36:33] And finally the best line of all.

[00:36:35] It was funny to be honest.

[00:36:36] I wasn't like any of them would jealous of me for getting to go on the bill.

[00:36:42] Me out at the end, the bill was cancelled soon after that wasn't it?

[00:36:45] I think that night.

[00:36:47] I'm pretty sure no the bill went over.

[00:36:50] I want to see Martin Keon in the bill.

[00:36:52] I think this is a trend we should bring back there should be more footballers going on.

[00:36:57] We're just turning up in like pressy dramas.

[00:37:03] Yeah, in the car or something.

[00:37:06] Yeah, all I don't know if Diana's ghost you're like yeah.

[00:37:11] She's helping.

[00:37:13] Advising the queen on Diana's dad.

[00:37:16] I like him when they when they play themselves though.

[00:37:20] I think it's more fun.

[00:37:21] I like the playing card.

[00:37:22] I don't think any of them are good enough actors to do that.

[00:37:24] I like the other way.

[00:37:26] Yeah, like you say Eric Dyer turning up in stranger things.

[00:37:31] I'm no idea how he plays of them because he would be like zero when that shows out.

[00:37:36] Yes, that was it.

[00:37:38] That was how Emmanuel putty and what did you find that?

[00:37:42] Well, I think I think I did the stepping stones quite clearly.

[00:37:46] I was googling funny football cameos.

[00:37:49] I do every day.

[00:37:50] Even I'm not doing this.

[00:37:51] I found that and I also found a beautiful press shot photo which you can buy on eBay for

[00:37:57] 20 quid of Emmanuel with his arm around the lady in a brace in the hospital.

[00:38:01] I know what I'm getting you for Christmas.

[00:38:03] Thank you very much.

[00:38:04] I cannot wait to open it.

[00:38:09] And finally, the moment we've all been waiting for.

[00:38:12] Oh no, I can't believe it.

[00:38:13] The story that was billed as what was attached?

[00:38:15] The greatest story ever told?

[00:38:17] Yeah.

[00:38:18] That was a great story of all time.

[00:38:20] I was so arrogant 24 hours a day.

[00:38:23] Here in your stories that are all really funny and good, I feel like I've instantly walked into a trap.

[00:38:30] Well, look, you know, I will stick my head into the lion's den.

[00:38:35] Yeah.

[00:38:36] And that's up on a heart.

[00:38:37] He doesn't back down.

[00:38:38] It's true.

[00:38:39] One thing I've heard doesn't matter.

[00:38:40] Lionheart, you mean?

[00:38:41] Yeah.

[00:38:42] Lionheart, but Lionheart, but Lionheart.

[00:38:43] Lions and heads are very relevant to this story.

[00:38:47] Oh, okay.

[00:38:48] But first of all, we have to go back to a momentous day in football history.

[00:38:55] Saturday, the 8th of August, 1998.

[00:38:58] You guys remember what you were doing then?

[00:39:00] It would have been just after the World Cup.

[00:39:02] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:39:03] Yeah.

[00:39:04] Probably down Riverside ice and leisure.

[00:39:08] It was probably a fenton man, I hear.

[00:39:12] Yeah.

[00:39:13] James is pressing his face up against Mizzoula saying one day.

[00:39:17] I'll be able to get in there.

[00:39:19] So a very young Rio Ferdinand in the age.

[00:39:22] Yeah, sorry.

[00:39:23] Well, Saturday, the 8th of August, 1998 was the creation of one of the greatest characters

[00:39:34] in football history.

[00:39:36] It was at the Vetch Stadium in Swansea.

[00:39:39] Swansea football, Swansea wasn't doing particularly well.

[00:39:43] They were in, I think, division two at this point.

[00:39:45] And a lot of the fans were going a bit restless.

[00:39:48] They were worried that their team wasn't doing very well, but they've been told there was a lot of investment coming into the club.

[00:39:53] So they were expecting a couple of new faces, a couple of it start the season, expecting like big players to come through.

[00:39:59] What they got was a giant swan called Cyril the Swan.

[00:40:06] Cyril the Swan was their mascot.

[00:40:10] The club had decided because they weren't doing very well, they were trying to get the glamour and excitement of the Premier League by creating a mascot who would sort of entertain the crowd.

[00:40:21] And the fans were a bit like, oh great, a giant swan.

[00:40:25] This is a man in a Swan costume.

[00:40:27] It's basically the first he was the first.

[00:40:29] Like the mass singer.

[00:40:30] Like the mass singer, but this was in 1998 when there weren't that many mascots around.

[00:40:37] There was definitely the preserve of the NFL and a couple of Premier League teams.

[00:40:40] Now mascots are everywhere, you know, now you've got like, you've got, it's going to soar us, you've got your Harry Hornet for what for whatever he's called.

[00:40:49] You've got the boiler for West Brom.

[00:40:51] Everyone loves the boiler.

[00:40:53] This was in 1998.

[00:40:54] This was when football was at the vet, it was quite hard and rough.

[00:40:58] And there were just a bunch of men standing there, expecting their team to come out and they got a man in a giant swan costume.

[00:41:06] And therefore everyone was a little bit like, oh, okay.

[00:41:09] Well, this seems pretty half, half asked, half baked.

[00:41:14] He goes on to have the greatest game that anyone has ever had as a mascot in his first match against.

[00:41:23] I think while his first match was against extra not much happens.

[00:41:27] It's when the groundsment at the time Eddie Don takes on the role of, of Sir Otis one.

[00:41:35] I assume his first performance is weren't great and it didn't like they were like, we've got to drop you and get someone else in.

[00:41:40] Eddie Don is fucking mad.

[00:41:45] Eddie Don puts on the head and at the very start.

[00:41:50] It's a cut match against Norwich City at the very start of this cut match.

[00:41:54] He barges into Norwich's assistant manager during the time and knocks him to the floor and everyone's a bit like, who is this guy and what's he doing?

[00:42:04] Pretty quickly though.

[00:42:07] Swansea equalized a gone one or down against Norwich and then Swansea equalized when, when Swansea equalized,

[00:42:14] Cyril the Swan Eddie Don is for all this one jumps into the crowd and starts like crowds.

[00:42:19] Something as the crowd chart who they gun who they gun.

[00:42:27] This freaked out the opposition so much they were like, that's one is coming nowhere.

[00:42:32] Fucking near us with the replay.

[00:42:35] The second leg they were like, no we're banning Cyril the Swan.

[00:42:38] But Cyril the Swan kept going.

[00:42:40] He kept going during the season, getting weirder and weirder.

[00:42:45] Apparently as Eddie, Eddie as Cyril the Swan got more and more obnoxious and weird.

[00:42:52] They had like, you know, football they have penalty shootouts with the mascot.

[00:42:57] And usually the plan is you let the ball go in because you're playing as the child.

[00:43:02] Cyril would not do that.

[00:43:05] Cyril saved every single penalty and then like swore at the kids thrusting his pelvis at the kids.

[00:43:13] The crowd boo him and he moons them.

[00:43:16] How does Swan Moon have this one?

[00:43:19] I assume his Swan hours.

[00:43:22] I feel like there was a line otherwise.

[00:43:25] But now it's ones he aren't doing particularly well at this time and he is the only popular person in Swansea.

[00:43:33] Like he more vulnerable than any of the players, he gets like asked to go to after dinner speeches.

[00:43:38] He becomes like a local legend when Cyril comes out everyone screams and cheers.

[00:43:44] And there's literally, there's footage when Swansea played Millwall of Cyril the Swan

[00:43:52] like coming onto the pitch after they score.

[00:43:54] And again, just like, he's basically the best of Swansea it seems.

[00:43:58] Like really like wriling people up and getting very excited.

[00:44:02] But the...

[00:44:06] That match as a moment.

[00:44:09] And I don't know if you could do this now as a moment where it starts and the referee.

[00:44:13] And Cyril is like going up and down the...

[00:44:15] Up and down the touch line doing his usual like,

[00:44:18] ah, honk honk honk, hooligan hooligan hooligan.

[00:44:21] The referee says something apparently says to him,

[00:44:23] have I got to put it with this little game?

[00:44:25] And then the Swan nods and then hit butts in?

[00:44:29] What?

[00:44:33] And then he's so shocked.

[00:44:35] He's like, okay, I guess that's fine.

[00:44:38] Oh my god.

[00:44:39] When they...

[00:44:42] The Swansea win, they beat Millwall 3 and ill.

[00:44:45] When they win, I think after maybe after the third goal, Cyril this one,

[00:44:49] kicks the ball really, really hard at a Millwall player.

[00:44:53] And it smacks him in the back of the head and he falls down.

[00:44:56] Amazing.

[00:44:57] Cyril is just like a maniac to the well chef A find him.

[00:45:03] And they have to ban him for a couple of games.

[00:45:07] And it means they have to...

[00:45:10] They have to call in a watchdog effectively to create new rules.

[00:45:17] They bring Cyril this one and Swansea management in to be like,

[00:45:20] okay, mascot's are going mad and you're doing two of NoxismWid help us create some guidelines and some rules.

[00:45:26] So basically it sort of...

[00:45:29] It gets a little bit calmer after that for a few years.

[00:45:32] But in 2001, Cyril's greatest moment happens.

[00:45:39] It's again against Millwall and I think at this point,

[00:45:42] Cyril and Millwall have a little bit of tastiness going on.

[00:45:45] There's a little bit of a vibe here that they don't like.

[00:45:48] And it's at the Vetch.

[00:45:50] And apparently in the olden days, mascots would regularly go to other clubs.

[00:45:54] I don't know if this happens anymore does it?

[00:45:57] Yeah, I don't think so.

[00:45:58] Do you ever see...

[00:45:59] I think I've seen one game well.

[00:46:01] It's like weird, like them traveling on the bus next to me.

[00:46:04] Are they the bus driver?

[00:46:07] Do they have to...

[00:46:09] But I think I watched a match where I think it was Arsenal versus Bournemouth

[00:46:13] and Arsenal were very good at the time.

[00:46:15] And Bournemouth, I think, won the penalty shootout with the mascot.

[00:46:20] They brought their mascot and Bournemouth won the penalty.

[00:46:22] And I remember thinking at the time, like, fucking hell this can't get anywhere.

[00:46:25] As an Arsenal fan.

[00:46:27] But in the olden days, like I say, it would be quite regular that mascots would come.

[00:46:33] And by 2001, a lot of clubs are getting their own syruals.

[00:46:36] And Millwall have their own mascot now called Zampa, Zampa the Lion.

[00:46:41] And apparently before they've been sort of trading insults throughout this,

[00:46:46] when it came to half time in this match in 2001 between Zampa and the Lion and Siraluswan

[00:46:51] they're supposed to have a penalty shootout and they're waiting at the goal.

[00:46:56] They're waiting for...

[00:46:58] Siralus is at the goal, waiting for Zampa to come out.

[00:47:02] He doesn't come out.

[00:47:03] They still wait.

[00:47:04] They're a bit confused.

[00:47:05] Suddenly from another entrance, like something out of WWE,

[00:47:10] Zampa the Lion sprints across the stadium and starts trying to pummel Siraluswan

[00:47:18] and they have an out and out like fight on the pitch.

[00:47:22] He just storms into him, trying to land blows.

[00:47:26] So what was interesting is apparently Siraluswan knew he had to be on his best behavior

[00:47:31] because the officials have been like, don't you fucking ruin this for us, Siraluswan.

[00:47:35] Like we know that there's going to be trouble against Millwall.

[00:47:38] Just don't rise to it.

[00:47:39] Don't rise to it.

[00:47:40] It all changed when Zampa the Lion tries to behead Siraluswan.

[00:47:47] And that is something we do not do in mascot law.

[00:47:52] It is an effect to one's honor.

[00:47:56] So he tries to punch his head off and at that point Eddie Don,

[00:48:02] as Siraluswan decides enough is enough.

[00:48:07] This fucking lion is going down.

[00:48:09] He does a dodge, a turn.

[00:48:11] He does a massive upper cut to Zampa the Lion's head.

[00:48:16] It comes clean off.

[00:48:18] Zampa the Lion falls down.

[00:48:20] The mascot hides his face in shame and horror.

[00:48:23] Don't look at me!

[00:48:25] Siral picks up the head of Zampa the Lion, runs over to the Millwall players

[00:48:30] and fans and just boots it at them.

[00:48:33] And the the Vetch goes fucking wild.

[00:48:36] It's like it's like bike club and a man's head has been punched clean off.

[00:48:41] I think at that point there's much of it.

[00:48:45] It's really incredible.

[00:48:48] Like it's...

[00:48:50] I think after that point they were like, okay we need to kill...

[00:48:54] Like not kills.

[00:48:55] They don't kill Siral.

[00:48:56] Siral goes down the history.

[00:48:59] Siral does like Panto.

[00:49:00] Siral does...

[00:49:01] Wow.

[00:49:02] I think he releases a song.

[00:49:03] Does he go on a home of the Braithwaves?

[00:49:05] He goes home with the Braithwaves.

[00:49:08] He turns up in the Fifth Amendment.

[00:49:11] He's in the bill.

[00:49:14] But in the end they say Siral has basically been retired now.

[00:49:18] Apparently Siral has a girlfriend or wife called Sibyl.

[00:49:22] He's quiet and down a bit as well, which is good.

[00:49:25] He's found love.

[00:49:26] But there was a while there where Siral was the unstoppable force.

[00:49:30] A real wild child.

[00:49:33] Very...

[00:49:34] Wow.

[00:49:35] That's a very...

[00:49:36] I hope it was also like Fight Club in that...

[00:49:38] Zamper didn't actually exist.

[00:49:40] Yeah, yeah.

[00:49:41] At the end everyone's like, why is Siral been punching himself in the face?

[00:49:45] What's going on?

[00:49:47] And yeah, Siral lived heavily after until Jamie Vardy shot him.

[00:49:53] All right Pee.

[00:49:56] All right Pee Siral.

[00:49:57] But you know what Jack?

[00:49:59] I think it lived up to the hype.

[00:50:01] I think it lived up to the hype.

[00:50:02] It was pretty good.

[00:50:03] Very good.

[00:50:04] It's just a great story.

[00:50:06] I think it has everything.

[00:50:08] It does.

[00:50:09] I'd like to watch like a sketch of it.

[00:50:11] Oh, okay.

[00:50:12] Not a film because I have...

[00:50:14] I'm a pitch.

[00:50:18] I think I'd like that.

[00:50:20] But shorter.

[00:50:23] I'd like to watch an episode of The Bill About It.

[00:50:26] Yeah.

[00:50:27] You can get arrested.

[00:50:29] Yeah.

[00:50:30] Very very good.

[00:50:31] Have you seen that?

[00:50:32] Muscoz's Minute Silence Twitter account.

[00:50:34] Oh, yeah.

[00:50:35] This is basically what inspired it because I was like there must be something to do with the mascots

[00:50:38] where the mascots have to use their minds.

[00:50:40] Have you ever seen that Crystal Ball?

[00:50:42] Crystal Ball as well.

[00:50:43] Oh, yeah.

[00:50:44] Yeah.

[00:50:45] It's quite funny.

[00:50:46] That's fun.

[00:50:47] Yeah.

[00:50:48] Yeah.

[00:50:49] Okay. So I shouldn't make it into a film.

[00:50:50] I think you should.

[00:50:51] You should.

[00:50:52] Yeah.

[00:50:54] That would be good.

[00:50:56] That would be a good casting.

[00:50:58] And Mill Wahl doing it in Danny Baker.

[00:51:00] Danny's that's...

[00:51:02] That is so the line.

[00:51:03] Alice James hummeling Danny Baker into the floor.

[00:51:05] There we go.

[00:51:06] Yeah, that's the pitch.

[00:51:08] Okay. So it is time for everyone to vote for who they think should be King Story Person,

[00:51:14] winner of hearts and minds.

[00:51:16] So I would do a recap of the stories we kicked off with Tash's stories about South American traditions

[00:51:23] and superstitions regarding her hero Taylor Swift. Then we had James Bougion talking about

[00:51:28] a Romanian football who died but didn't die. Turned off his own wake. Then we had Emmanuel

[00:51:35] Petit on the bill, and finally we had Cyril the deranged Swansea mascot. That's all vote.

[00:51:45] I'm going to ask, we're doing an order of it was on the show. I think so King Story person,

[00:51:54] who's your vote going to? You can't vote for yourself actually. I'll let people do that because

[00:51:59] that's a really mean kind of no. You can't vote for yourself. You can't vote for yourself.

[00:52:03] I am going to go four. Oh you can't see this but Jack is crossing his fingers like I'm about to

[00:52:14] announce the winner of Big Brother. I am actually going to go for Jack. Yes.

[00:52:20] Which is annoying because I didn't want to. I did everything in my power not to want to do that,

[00:52:27] but I'm fair. It's true. So you want about Tash's fair.

[00:52:33] This is probably the best. Tash's fair. The meanest vote anyone's ever done by the way can I just say

[00:52:40] what I don't want to vote for. No one wants to see this guy win. We will once see non-stop misery for

[00:52:48] Jack Bernard and general. I got that. I understand that. His story was the best and I am also going to go

[00:52:55] over his. I was very impressed by Tash's attention to detail in the story. I was less impressed by James

[00:53:02] attention to detail as admitted himself. But I liked his story. But yes, I'm going to go for

[00:53:10] Jampa because I just love swans being the shit out of each other.

[00:53:16] The mascot is just funny aren't they? They are funny. They are funny. Which means James you could

[00:53:23] get just go Jack first. Who's Jack who's your vote going to? This will make it a bit more interesting.

[00:53:27] I mean, everyone's done very well. Can I just say all the stories? We're all winners.

[00:53:32] We're all winners really. I think personally I love Tash's level of attention to detail as you say

[00:53:44] and I love the wake. I do love the wake but you know what? You know what? I think I've got to give

[00:53:50] it to Patie personally because I the the multimedia experience. I would you mean James?

[00:54:00] I've got to give it to because I liked the multimedia experience and I like the fact that it was

[00:54:04] an Arsenal player. I liked that. I liked I do also like that's an area of football that I really

[00:54:11] enjoy. The people doing cameos on shows and the fact that he thought it was going to be friends

[00:54:15] very funny. You know what? Yes. Thank you very much. Sorry on behalf of a manual.

[00:54:26] This is a real greec Cypress Eurovision voting situation. We haven't texted each other all day.

[00:54:37] James deciding vote goes to you. I genuinely enjoyed all the stories.

[00:54:43] I Tash appreciate the references, the effort. James to echo at Jack said the

[00:54:52] mix media approach. Give it a different time. Lovely stuff. Thank you. And to me the brevity brilliant.

[00:55:03] But read it where it's due. It's Bernhardt. There we go. Let's play the music.

[00:55:13] I've got to read the sore house.

[00:55:17] There we go. Not getting murdered today.

[00:55:24] I'm our third ever King story person winner of hearts and minds. How does it feel Jack?

[00:55:30] To where that ground really good actually feels very emotional. I told myself I wasn't going to cry.

[00:55:37] But I really tried this week. You know, I really tried. The other times I wasn't trying so much

[00:55:43] and that's why I'm.

[00:55:46] Humble is always.

[00:55:49] Wow, there we go. That is it. That is thank you all for your stories. That is all for this week's

[00:55:54] episode. You're back in a fortnight. If you can't wait that long, join the book club on Patreon.

[00:55:59] Book where members of the club get a brand new exclusive bonus chapter episode every other week

[00:56:04] where we chat even more about the book. Three pound 50s of join. Please do or just support us

[00:56:08] for a measly pound coin per month head to patreon.com forward slash football book club in the meantime

[00:56:14] do get in touch with us at footy book club on Twitter Instagram at football book club.

[00:56:18] Send us your thoughts. Your author footballer puns Ken Zong requests because Zong will be back

[00:56:23] guys any lost words.

[00:56:26] It's got to be a Taylor Swift reference song, right? Just any.

[00:56:32] This is one about ending. What's the only thing that's nice things.

[00:56:35] That's awesome.

[00:56:36] Yeah, this is what we can't have nice things.

[00:56:38] There we go. This is a lot of fun.

[00:56:40] Nice things. Goodbye everyone.

[00:56:43] Bye!

[00:56:51] Thanks for listening to football book club. It featured James Bug, Jack Bernhardt,

[00:56:55] Natasha Frisco and James Bougen. It was created and produced by James Bug.

[00:57:01] The music heals behind the work of Silent Partner

[00:57:03] and is using the Creative Commons 4.0 license. We'll be back to the autobiographies in a fortnight

[00:57:09] until then. Bye bye!